Saturday, June 26, 2010

What you think that's costing us?

Young man on bike: "So, what you think that's costing us? Four cops?"

Older man: "Lots, and what did the kid do?"

Young man on bike: "Nothing, really. He's walking down the street with a holstered gun -- which, by the way, is legal in Maine."

Older man: "That all? Four cops with cruisers for that?"

Young man: "I believe so."

Older man: "Hell, in Pasquale nobody would bat an eye."




(Overheard in front of the Hay building in Portland Square)

Friday, June 25, 2010

Book Lovers

Guy #1, perusing a bin of one dollar books: "People don't appreciate books anymore since they got computers, but where did the first computer come from?"

Guy #2: "I dunno."
 
Guy#1: "A book. Yeah, think about it."




(Overheard by JR on Congress Street)

Carpenter, Forester, Golfer or ?




(Seen in Middle Street parking lot)

Monday, June 21, 2010

I Don't Like That Word

Woman in her late 20s, to friend: "That's my new thing. I block pregnant women on Facebook. Please don't send me fetus updates -- I don't like that word."



(Overheard by AS at Downtown Lounge)

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

If Nothing Else...

Woman on the phone with a kid in each arm: "Well, listen honey. You're kind, you're sweet, you're cute...you're MEXICAN! The whole fuckin' package!"





(Overheard by Anthony at the Old Port Festival)

Friday, June 11, 2010

Kids These Days

Woman to friend: "I love my grand kids, but their status updates are so boring."



(Overheard by JR in a Portland doctor's office waiting room)

When Did the Skies Become So Beautiful?

Man with long gray hair, wearing a karate outfit, to a group of tourists: "MMM, isn't the air today so nice? And my clothes, they're so soft! And and and the leaves are luscious. And that man's dinner jacket fits so well [he gestures to a tourist in a dinner jacket]! Mmm, and my clothes, mmm, my clothes are so soft. AND MMMM [slowly becoming more and more agitated and manic] MY CLOTHES ARE SO SOFT. HOW DOES THIS HAPPEN? WHEN DID THE SKIES BECOME SO BEAUTIFUL? MMMMM EVERYTHING IS SO NICE!"



(Overheard by LJ in Longfellow Square)

Wednesday, June 09, 2010

A Very Special Congress Street Moment

First guy on stoop: "Suck it, barbershop motherfucker."

Second guy on stoop
: "Yeah, motherfucker."

Woman on stoop: (Vomits copiously all over the sidewalk).




(Overheard by DM on Congress Street)

Tuesday, June 08, 2010

Excuses

Female employee: "I don't like to drink. It gives people an excuse to be stupid."

Male employee: "I like excuses."




(Overheard by MP at the South Portland Goodwill)

Monday, June 07, 2010

Friday, June 04, 2010