Friday, March 31, 2006

Not Bad, For a Hundred Bucks

Guy with an earring: Yep, I've been to Fore Street [the restaurant]. Oh, oh yeah... it's not great, but it's decent.

(Overheard on the sidewalk outside Fore Street)

Thursday, March 30, 2006

Balthazar

8th grader 1: Ha, ha, Balthazar.
8th grader 2: What, Balthazar? What, who, why, who told you about Balthazar? Did you just say Balthazar?
8th grader 1: Ha, ha. I just called her Balthazar.

(Overheard at King Middle School)

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Circumchances

Man with slick hair style walking by with group of friends with shiny shoes: It's just different circumchances.

Monday, March 27, 2006

Shogun

Party animal A : We'll pretend I didn't just do that (after knocking over a grill on back porch).
Party animal B : We'll blame it on me.
Party animal A : We'll blame it on you.
Party animal B : We'll blame it on me because I'm the shogun.
Party animal A : Yes.

Saturday, March 25, 2006

Lisp

My Mom: My daughter plays the harp.
Korean Tailor: OHHH! The harp! Your daughter happy playing, and you happy just shitting there watching her play!

(Overheard at The Sewing Shop)

Interesting Metaphor

Woman: ...so then yesterday, I went hiking with this guy who has size 14 feet, but they don't make size 14 hiking shoes, so he had to get size 13! Can you imagine? Anyway, then we biked all the way to the general store, bought a couple bananas and a bottle of beer, and ate it like a rat!

(Overheard at Yosaku.)

Friday, March 24, 2006

Keep Your Hands to Yourself

8th Grader 1: You touch my stuff?!
8th Grader 2: No, why would I touch your stuff?
8th Grader 1: You don't touch my stuff! You touch my stuff and I kick your head off!!!

(Overheard at King Middle School)

Mispro-nown-ciation

Pompous Business Guy: NAN! NAN! COULD WE HAVE SOME NAN OVER HERE!
{meant naan}

(Overheard at Tandoor Indian Cuisine)

Weapons of Mass Destruction

Hippie art student #1: Yeah, that would be so cool!
Hippie art student #2: And we could have, like, car bombs!

(Overheard at UMaine Orono)

Monday, March 20, 2006

Mattress Car

Art Student #1: Oh, man! Look at this!
Art Student #2: Cool! Metal bed frame!
Art Student #1: OH! We could put on bicycle wheels and a mattress, and ride it down the street!!!


(Overheard near USM)

Tourist Wisdom

Tourist #1: What's that?
Tourist #2: Oh, nothing. That's just the tidehorn.
Tourist #1: The what?
Tourist #2: It tells you when the tide's coming in.


(Overheard at the Lobster Shack in Cape Elizabeth)