Skinny Meg

Woman #1: Well, you are small.

Woman #2: But I'm not like skinny Meg!

(Overheard by Artemis at Bubblemaineia)

Tall Means Power

Woman #1: I always feel tall in shoes; it's a psychological thing.

Woman #2: That's okay. Tall means power.

(Overheard by Artemis in Kohl's, in South Portland)

The Fuck Song

Teenage girl: Oh, do we have the Fuck Song? Or does Grandma still have it?

(Overheard in a car)

Love in the Quick Check-Out

Man: That turns me on.
Woman: Oh, does it? (While rubbing a box containing a whole rotisserie chicken against Man's chest.)

(Overheard at Westbrook Shaw's supermaket)

Theivery!

Cool Dude: And then he was all like "Gimme a sip of your drink."
Hip Chick: What did you say?
Cool Dude: I was like, "No way man, I've fallen for that way too many times before."
Hip Chick: Good, like, assertiveness.

They're Everywhere

Guy: Wait, so where are they?
Girl: They live, like, on the skin of apples.
Guy: Whoa.

Overheard on Emery St. Sunday afternoon

546 Years Young

Teacher: I actually went to visit Ponce de Leon's house in Puerto Rico.
8th grader: Oh, he's still alive? Oh...

(Overheard at King Middle School)

Ain't That the Truth?

Loud Lady: Sometimes, when you're very angry, it's hard to say the word "defecation."

(Overheard at Panera in Westbrook)

Middle School Communist

8th grader 1: Why do you hate Communists?
Communist 8th grader: I am a Communist.
Long pause
8th grader 1: So why do you hate them?
Communist 8th grader: I don't.
8th grader 1: Oh.
Long pause
8th grader 1: Wait, so like, what is Communism?

(Overheard at King Middle School)