White Lines

70-something lady to her older gentleman companion: "I only do cocaine when I'm not home."




(Overheard by LEB at Silly's)

It Gets Better

Young woman, to friend: "You've gotten a lot better. I've only seen you puke that bad twice. I used to worry you'd puke on my couch when you'd stay over."




(Overheard by AS at Jimmy the Greek's in South Portland)

Ask a Silly Question

Woman: "I see you have a watch on. Do you know what time it is?"  

Little boy: "It's right now!"



(Overheard by LR at 302 West Smokehouse & Tavern in Fryeburg)

Your Mom is Everywhere

Future bridesmaid, to other future bridesmaids: "Now my mom has Snapchat."



(Overheard by AS at Jimmy the Greek's in South Portland)

THAT'S Ohio

First college girl: "I can't even imagine what Ohio is like."

Second college girl: "Okay, I'm going to this American themed party. I have to wear, like, America all over my body and drink beer all night. In a bar. THAT'S Ohio."



(Overheard at the Portland Transportation Center)

Free At Last

School bus driver, hollering out the window: "Juny Judeson retired! He just walked off! He's on a cruise now!"




(Overheard by IWH on a Portland Public School bus)

Actually, Good Question

Person #1, to Person #2: "You have an iPhone? What's the "i" stand for?"




(Overheard by RC at the Gulf of Maine Research Institute)