I Can't Decide Between the Cherry and the Buttscotch

(Seen on Brighton Avenue in Westbrook)

They're Certainly Dressed For It

One very skinny aged man in a long, flowing white robe and head scarf to another (nearly) identical man: "We are now prepared for that day when Jesus appears in the clouds!"





(Overheard by DM at Mesa Verde)

Or Maybe Your Chicken

Keynote speaker at Model U.N., visiting from India: "And remember, the world is your rooster!"




(Overheard by ZWH at USM Gorham)

Lost

Furiously smoking woman, leaning out of her car window: "Excuse me! Excuse me! Is this the way to the hospital and the jail?"





(Overheard by MH on Brighton Avenue)

F**k Love

(Seen on Forest Avenue)

Who Asked You?

(Seen on Deering Avenue)

Vacuum Cleaner

Late 20's Woman #1: "Hey, how was your date to that party?"

Late 20's Woman #2: "I'm here to tell you I might as well have been dancing with a vacuum cleaner."

Woman #1: "Oh! Well, at least he was easy on the eyes."




(Overheard at Coffee By Design)

The People I Kill

Clerk, to large, bug-eyed man with a Mohawk and a portable oxygen tank: "Excuse me sir, are you next?"

Man: "No, I do believe these young ladies are next [gestures to two boys]. I don't cut in lines: the people who cut in lines are the people I kill."



(Overheard by LJ at Cumberland Farms)

It's Undeniable

(Seen at the Nickelodeon)