Thursday, March 14, 2013

A Select Clientele

Woman to Male Friend: "I want it to be the kind of place that attracts artists and musicians, not riffraff."

(Overheard by JR at Arabica)

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Sacrifice for Savings

Woman (pointing to a box of macaroni and cheese): "I buy these at Walmart."

Second Woman: "Are they a good deal?"

Woman: "I never eat them, so they are a great deal for me."

(Overheard by JR at the USM campus store)

Saturday, March 09, 2013

Don't We All?

Scruffy-looking older guy, to pal: "I wonder what cavity searches are like..."

(Overheard by HC at the corner of Franklin and Commercial Street)

Friday, March 08, 2013

Meteorology Dreams

Guy, to dining companions: "I love weather research--it's where my heart is."

(Overheard by WH at Applebee's in Portland)

Thursday, March 07, 2013

The Truth

Girl in line, to sales clerk: "Let me tell you thumthing. If thumone tellth you that it doethn't hurt to get your tongue pierthed, don't believe them--it thure doeth hurt!"

(Overheard by KC at the CVS on Congress Street)

Wednesday, March 06, 2013

The Dating Game

Young man on cell phone: "Yeah, she's a functioning drug addict. Unlike my last girlfriend, who was just an asshole."

(Overheard by BS outside the Portland Public Library)

Tuesday, March 05, 2013

Between Popes

One old salty dog to another: "Fish n' chips? Fish n'chips? Why you gettin' fish n' chips instead of chili?"

Second salty dog: "It's Friday. Gotta eat fish on Friday."

First salty dog: "No you don't! Ain't no pope: you can eat chili!"

(Overheard by Mindy at Three Dollar Deweys)