Thursday, August 27, 2020

Not a Kid's Drink

Kid 1: "Have you ever had a Red Bull?"

Kid 2: "What kind of kid do you think I am?!"

Kid 1: "So you haven't had one?"

Kid 2: "No! It's not a kid's drink!"

Kid 1: "You mean it's like alcohol?"

Kid 2: "No! It's an energy drink? But it's not a kid's drink!"

Kid 1: "My friend who's in fifth — going into sixth — grade LEGIT had one."

Kid 2: "YO! What the hell's wrong with him?!"

(Overheard by ZWH and IWH at Pine Point Beach)

Tuesday, August 11, 2020

Senior Hours

Older woman, upon seeing the Senior Hours sign outside Trader Joe's: "Senior hours 8am to 9 am?! I ain't getting up at 8am, I'm retired!"

Thursday, May 28, 2020

From Away

Neighbor: "We're sitting on the back porch on a sixty degree day. We must be real Mainers!"

(Overheard by JR on Frances Street)

Tuesday, May 26, 2020

Kids Teach Kant

Kid 1: "Do you want to play trucks?"

Kid 2: "Mom said we were supposed to help by cleaning the paintbrushes."

Kid 1: "That's what we're supposed to do. I am asking what you want to do."

(Overheard by JR on Frances Street)

Monday, March 23, 2020


Girl, about six years old, to her dad: "If there isn't going to be any more school, they should at least give our art projects back. (Yelling) THEY PROMISED US THEY'D GIVE THEM BACK!!"

(Overheard by ER from more than six feet away, on a trail in Portland)

Tuesday, March 10, 2020

Every. Single. Time.

Middle aged man to other middle aged man, breaking long silence: "Do you ever look at your last load of laundry and think, 'Maybe I'll just throw this out'?"

(Overheard by SH at Tony's Donuts)

Monday, March 09, 2020

Someone's Idea of Fun

Second-grader: "Corona is a fun word!"

(Overheard by AR in an elementary school classroom outside of Portland)

Friday, March 06, 2020

Pisces Season

Person to friend: "He's a Pisces? Everyone's a Pisces! That used to be my thing!"

(Overheard by AJL in a Congress Street bar)