Infrared Conversion

Customer: "Photoshop has an infrared conversion effect??"




(Overheard by Anthony Joe at the Photo Market)

Crazy Navajo

Crazy guy, doing spiritual native American hand gestures: "Hey sister! Any chance you can help out a crazy Navajo?"

Me, a boy: "What?"

Crazy Navajo: "I'm wet, I'm from Tuscon Arizona, and I need your umbrella!"





(Overheard by IWH on Congress Street in the rain)

And You Know What That Means!

Girl, describing why her two friends should meet and possibly hit it off romantically: "She likes tinctures, he likes tinctures..."





(Overheard by JR at Arabica)

So Cute

Crazy Woman with gold tooth: "How old is your baby?"

Babysitter: "Almost a year."

Crazy Woman: (laughs maniacally for an extremely uncomfortable length of time)

Crazy Woman: "She's so cute! How old is she?"




(Overheard by Z and I in Monument Square)

Hands Up, Buddy

Little Kid A to Little Kid B: "I've got seaweed, and I'm not afraid to use it!"






(Overheard by Anonymous at Crescent Beach)

German Bus

Concord-Trailways bus driver, to passengers over the loudspeaker: "This is my favorite bus...NOT. Those Germans don't know how to design a bus. This bus is a piece of crap!"






(Overheard by Margot on the Boston-to-Portland bus)

Poop

Young boy, from inside a bathroom stall: "Mom, it feels so good when the poop comes out!"




(Overheard by Deb at Flatbread)

Patriots

Blond 20-something woman in car with New Hampshire plates, gesturing to the bumper sticker on the back of my car, which is parked in my driveway: "Way to ruin America!"

Me, confused: "Huh? Way to ruin America?"

Her companion, an equally annoying 20-something man, doing a "thumbs-down" gesture: "Obama SUCKS!"




(Overheard in my driveway)

A Wet Situation

Four year-old boy, from bathroom stall, to his mother in an adjacent stall: "Uh oh. I've got kind of a wet situation here. It's mostly piddle."






(Overheard by Mama D in Brunswick)

Profit & Loss

Fairly cheerful and extremely intoxicated woman, to a group of gallery goers: "My brother has $10,000 in the bank, but he won't give me twenty cents to park my car. I'm gonna put a rock through his windshield and that's gonna cost a lot more than twenty cents!"



(Overheard outside Field Gallery on India Street)

Bad

(Seen in Deering Oaks)

Dead Dogs

Dentist, to hygienist: "God, I hate my dogs. I just can't wait for those dogs to die."





(Overheard at a dentist's office in Scarborough)

Stuffing Machine

(Seen on Exchange Street)