For the First Time

Clerk: "Oh, you've got a birthday coming up!"

Customer: "Yeah, I'm gonna be 30 for the first time, man."





(Overheard by EB at Beverage Barn in Rockland)

You Know How They Are

Middle-aged woman on cell phone: "...and the dogs are gonna be pissed, 'cause I told them I would only be working til noon, and you know how vindictive they can be."





(Overheard by AJL on Middle Street)

Stupid Americans

Swankily-dressed, agitated young Russian woman on the largest cell phone seen since the '70s, who had just apparently been asked to keep her voice down: "Не волнуйтесь. Люди здесь являются слишком глупый понять, что я говорю." (Translation: "Don't worry. People here are too stupid to understand what I'm saying.")




(Overheard by TN at the Scarborough Walmart)

Wish List

Female MECA student, to friends: "I've had a Storm Trooper costume in my Amazon.com shopping cart for, like, months. It's 70 dollars. But I really want one."

Friends: (complete silence.)




(Overheard by JF outside Casablanca Comics on Free Comic Book Day)

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Woman on cell phone: "If you respected your wife you wouldn't have another woman's panties under your bed!"




(Overheard by TC on Spring Street)

Affirmation

Some allegedly white man: ‎"I'm white. I'm white. I'm a white man, you hear me? I'm white. I'm not black, I'm white. I'm white. I'm white."





(Overheard by DM from a window above Congress Street)